**Make sure to click on the links below to see some pictures
For those of us who suffer from ADHD, any other disorders which may lead one to not have the desire to read a long blog post, or those who are just lazy, I’ll cut to the chase. We are getting better at this, but we aren’t quite there yet. Our best position was 17th place Our fastest lap time was posted by Brad at 2:47.659. We completed 171 laps, and finished 33rd out of roughly 70. Our best finish yet, and not bad considering the car was off the track for more than two hours of race time. Which, technically, means we did in fact race for 12 hours at Sebring……
For the more patient, I’ll provide some details. Our first three drivers were Bobby, Sturgis, and J.D. Bobby got quite the scare during his stint. A car spun around and was rolling back, Bobby did his best to avoid it, but alas, his efforts were futile. The tail end of the spun car struck our passenger side pretty good and cost us a tire. No worries, we got back out there quick.
The car was FAST this race. The fastest it has ever been. It is officially a competitor now. We mostly attribute this to the improved fuel delivery system courtesy of J.D. and Brad. Instead of the stock saddle tank we now have a fancy shmancy fuel cell bolted down in the trunk. The result of this system is that we no longer suffer from fuel deprivation in turns, as a result, the car rockets out of corners and reels in almost everything on the track, except for those pesky buggers from Flat Out Racing in their 300zx. As a result of our new found speed, and to a small degree, driver skill, the first three drivers put us in prime position for the top twenty.
Brad hopped in the car and had a career performance peeling off a 2:47.659, the fastest lap the pizza car has had at Sebring. Thanks to extremely aggressive driving habits, we had no tread on our tires left, but we were now in seventeenth place and in position to gain more ground!
It was now time for Anthony to get behind the wheel. Unfortunately, luck was not on his side, as a tag team between a failing slave cylinder and a clutch that decided life was no longer worth living ended Anthony’s stint after two laps. Entering the hairpin at turn seven, the clutch refused to engage. Eventually the car went into gear, but by that time it was too late. She started slipping coming out of turn seven and shortly after she rolled to a stop. It smelled awful, like failure. This resulted in roughly two and a half hours of race time being lost. We were fortunate enough to have a rain delay, but alas, the Chumpcar Gods smited us further by not allowing us to work on the car during said rain delay.
The repair effort was grounded by J.D., Brad, and Sturgis. Perque stayed on the media and Bobby and Anthony were on tool retrieval duty and responsible for securing loose body parts with self tapping screws. Special thanks to Mr. DeLillo and Mrs. Bruno for going out to purchase a new slave cylinder, even though the jerks sold you the wrong size. J.D. proved once again to be the savior of the team. After the new clutch was installed he was able to bleed the slave cylinder, allowing it to hold on for the rest of the race.
Anthony switched with Perque to ensure that all six team members would be able to get some seat time. The clutch and the slave cylinder held on for Perque’s run, and all was going smoothly. That is until he encountered the Mystery Machine Civic Hatch, who violently coaxed Perque into a tire wall. He pulled in, and after some hammering and sawing she as back out on the track. Although at this point, one would be hard-pressed to find a straight body part on the car. Nonetheless, the car looks badass as hell in a Mad Max sort of way. The car now gives off the aura of “Don’t F with us, we aren’t afraid to crash into stuff.”
It was now time for Anthony to get back into the car, in the dark, in the rain. Needless to say, due to the aforementioned lack of luck, he quickly spun the car. There was no damage and it continued on its way. There was however one small curveball; the tinted helmet visor came down during the spin. Anthony, completely unaware of this, continued driving. He was nervous that he had previously undiagnosed night blindness that he was just learning about at night, in the rain, trying to race at Sebring. Eventually he found his mojo and had some wild drifts, epic battles, and semi-consistent lap times.
Bobby, after starting the race, appropriately finished it. We were very relieved that the car made it across the finish line. The thing looked like it stormed the beach at Normandy. Thanks to the efforts of J.D. helping to shoddily repair the Go-Daddy Volvo’s turbo, and the teams’ generosity when it came to lending other teams tools, we were awarded a 25 dollar gift card. It’s always nice to hear your name called at the award ceremony. So thanks to the glorious Chumpcar organizers for that.
A closing note to the guy who asked to borrow a set of pliers: A set of pliers!? Come on! We can understand needing a welding torch, or spare parts; BUT PLIERS!!?!?!?! This is a car race man! That’s like going skydiving and deciding not to bring the parachute! They are essential! Just giving you a hard time though. Keep on asking for tools, you can borrow them, just make sure you bring them back. If not, there will be hell to pay.
Special thanks to everyone who came out to support! You really don’t know how much it means to us!
Thanks for reading. Until next time, have fun, and keep the greasy side down.
Oh, and keep checking back for updates! (I’m pretty sure we have an epic video in the making)